eloriekam: (Mist catnip)
Another fic I originally wrote and posted somewhere else: here specifically, largely because I didn't want my journal to be crack-filled. Alas, I think that time is long past. ;-)


Title: Essential Upgrades
Author: [personal profile] eloriekam/[livejournal.com profile] eloriekam
Characters: Cybermen, random unnamed fans, any male characters in Doctor Who.
Rating: Ehh, best be Adult.
Warning: References to male/male pairings, orgies, and much crack. A few references to male anatomy and various 'results' of sex. Nothing is off limits from being 'cracked' in here.
Disclaimer: Doctor Who is not mine. This is probably a good thing, considering how much crack is coming out of my brain these days. At least I haven't blatantly stomped on any fixed points recently, I don't think.
Author's Notes: That sound you're hearing, the cracking? That's not Yvonne Hartman's window. That's the fourth wall, shattering. A lot. Thanks to [livejournal.com profile] fogsblue for letting me briefly reference the Spare Parts. No fans were harmed in the writing of this story and any resemblance to actual fans is probably a result of you taking this too seriously, so don't! Also, at 3:19 am, it apparently takes me a while to figure out how to spell 'respiratory'. Originally written and posted in July 2012, back when I could actually stay up crazy late.

Being nipped by a plot kitten at 2 am is a dangerous thing )
eloriekam: (headdesk by colonel_jack)
This fic was originally posted here under a different title. I'm not totally sure I want to admit to this much crack on my own journal, but I also think that ship has pretty much sailed.

Title: Sizes and Erogenous Zones
Author:[personal profile] eloriekam/[livejournal.com profile] eloriekam
Rating: Teen
Characters: K-9, one Dalek, one Cyberman
Disclaimer: The following should make it abundantly clear I don't own Doctor Who, for which we can all be thankful. Various cool people invented K-9, the Daleks, and the Cybermen. Not responsible for any damage caused by the reading of this fic.
Summary: K-9 is comparing sucker size with a Dalek and there's a Cyberman at K-9's tail. We probably don't want to know any more.
Warnings: Crack. Lots of crack. Threesome? Someone not me will have to verify if the innuendo is present or just in my pepperoni pizza-addled head (I just ate a whole 12-inch). Originally written October 2011 in response to a challenge pic at [livejournal.com profile] bad_wolf_rising.

You probably don't want to know any more, but if you do, right this way )

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